This or That.

I grew up despising the colour pink. I wouldn't wear it or own anything in any shade of it. I wore basketball shorts and slicked back ponytails and not a trace of makeup until I was almost out of high school. Pink was feminine, and so were sundresses and makeup and pretty hair and I couldn't be an athlete if I was too girly, obviously.

What a strange misconception I carried with me, letting it dictate how I dressed, what colours I let hung in my closet and how I perceived being not only an athlete but my capabilities based on how I looked because I had this idea that femininity showed weakness. These ideas shifted as I grew older and fast forward to this girl, this more confident, sure of her journey, self aware human. I can wear dresses and sill toss a perfect spiral, I can put on mascara and still strap on goalie pads, I can wear pink and still climb mountains.

The more I explore the outdoors though, the more I realize that there are still so many ways in which being or identifying as female is something that could potentially hinder your experiences and thanks to International Women's Day, I want to share a few. Not only are we under represented (let alone the BIPOC population) but we face some extra hurdles when it comes to adventures from safety to gear to judgements.

Safety

Why is it so challenging to feel feminine and capable at the same time? Without fail, on every single adventure I have been on whether it be a few hours north for a solo camping trip or on a plane to the west coast to explore the mountains, people are shocked when they hear I go by myself and one of the first questions is always "is it safe?" While my activities could be perceived as inherently risky, there is a level of risk management that is involved with all adventurous activities and definitely not something I am an expert at, always learning and improving. But is it safe for a solo female?

While I'd like to honestly answer yes, there are without a doubt some challenges or "extra risks" that I take into consideration when I'm alone. It's little things like being aware when I'm leaving campsites to go on hikes that I'm definitely alone, it's not posting or updating social media until I'm back in a safe space (not a bad thing since I get to enjoy the adventure more anyway), not talking to random people I meet and giving too much information about where I'm staying or what hikes I'm doing. When I'm camping or in the woods I feel completely safe, prepared and ready for the unknowns but as a solo female I definitely take extra precaution to ensure that my adventures are as safe as possible and yes, sometimes this includes sleeping with my knife and can of bear spray beside me.

Gear

Hard to believe for anyone that has known me for an extended period of time but I actually love that there is gear designed towards females with pretty colours, but often times this gear comes at a price or a sacrifice. It's also incredibly discriminating for females who don't want the more feminine colours or designs and here's why. His and Hers. Pink and petite or blue and big. A mantra knowing as "shrinking it and pinking it."

As a female with a longer torso, I struggled with finding a multi day pack that had the length to fit me properly, I was very aware that I wanted a "girly" colour but apparently, the size of female backpackers ends at an 18" back length. As soon as I started trying on packs that were meant for men, they were longer but also wider and became too big on me in one way or another. The opposite of this is to be noted, for females who don't want pink, purple or turquoise bags but are petite in size and have to search harder to find gear that fits them.

There is also the potential for problems with active wear and clothing, I find as a female with wider hips and what I like to call "hiking thighs" but a smaller waist, a lot of the time I'm sacrificing comfort in the legs for pants that don't fall off of me or pants that I'm constantly pulling up but give me room for movement. Unlike pants designed for men, female geared pants are often missing small features like belt loops.

Representation

While big brand companies are making it easier to access badass female icons in the outdoors, I still feel as though individuals who identify as female and especially females of colour are significantly under represented on social media, marketing campaigns and even within our own lives. There is such a long way to go when it comes to females feeling comfortable, confident and capable in the outdoors and I am so thankful for all the support I have in my life that allows me to pursue my dreams. I have heard from multiple friends or acquaintances online that "they could never do what I do" simply because of a lack of support or misunderstanding from those closest to them - something that could easily be changed with more representation of women in the outdoors.

I am still learning how to overcome my own barriers, preconceived ideas of how I should look or act. Trying to find a balance between pink, sparkly loving female and down and dirty, ready to rough it for a week and hike until my body hurts outdoorsy girl. But why do I have to be this or that, why can’t I be both?

I am proud, determined and thankful every day but especially today for the support I have, the courageous women that went before me and all the brands, social media accounts and females that are breaking barriers right along with me.

Happy International Women's day to all the badass women conquering their fears, chasing their dreams and being role models for everyone around you.